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  THEY CAME FROM OUTER SPACE
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BOOKS
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Lights, Camera, Trivia
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Some of the most famous abductions have occurred while people were traveling by automobile through a remote area at night. If yours' unexpectedly stalls and the lights go out, get out, head for the nearest shelter and start singing the AR Top Ten. How would a person
The Alien Invasion Survival Quiz
(7) If you leave your headlights switched to the on position, they'll come back on when the danger has passed. (8) Luck
(9) C (10) In or around any major city, military base or national monument. Those are usually the first to go.

Mars Attacks!
The charred remains of the Secret Service agent who gave his life to save the President's
in that situation know when it's safe to return to their vehicle?

8. Any one of a hundred unforeseen events can thwart even the most thorough counter-abduction training so you better have a plan of escape. That takes courage, cunning and a considerable amount of a four-letter word that rhymes with fuck(ed) if you don't make it. Whatever you decide to do, do it quickly. Those who do succeed, usually escape within the first thirty minutes of captivity.

9. How do undomesticated, grey aliens stay so thin?
All questions and quizzes written by Philip Cerreta unless otherwise noted
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W.H. Mumfrey, 2009
W.H. MUMFREY
Those boots were made for squashing. That's what they're gonna do. One of these days a Martian's gonna stomp all over you! Sing it, kids and then cover your eyes. The President (Jack Nicholson) made a conscious effort to step over something in the same scene. Do you remember who or what it was? We do.
Mars Attacks!
Tim Burton, 1996
Have you ever experienced a sensation of missing time? Have you ever found a metallic implant somewhere in your body? It's likely that you're a victim of alien abduction, and you don't even know it.

Aliens are among us. While the true intentions of these mysterious intruders from outer space are unknown, there's no doubt that their actions are nefarious. It's your right - your civic responsibility - to learn the skills necessary to protect yourself, your loved ones and ultimately your planet.

Make no mistake - our world is under attack and this handbook may be the only thing standing between the human race and total annihilation. Read it and join the resistance.
Whatever (and how often) they eat will remain a mystery until someone conducts an extraterrestrial anal probe of their own. Their frail bodies could also be the result of an anatomical flaw - the circumference of their neck. If you can wring water out of a dishtowel, you have what it takes to strangle one of the bastards. In the unlikely event that one ever gets it's hands on you, and you are able to choke it until it's blue in the face, your next course of action should be which of the following?

A. Kick the creature in the kahoonies if it has a pair or just check its pulse to make sure it's
dead.
B. Gouge its eyes out so it can't follow you if and when it regains consciousness
C. Run away as fast as you can
D. All of the above


10. Being in the right place at the wrong time. That, more than anything else, is the key to surviving the first wave of an all-out alien invasion. Where's the last place you want to be when the shit hits the fan?